The college recruiting process is tough, but it’s also probably your first real experience with rejection in life, which is an invaluable lesson. You, your parents, and your coaches might have all the faith in the world in your abilities to play at the top level, but sometimes that’s still not enough. Sometimes hard working, talented people get over-looked. Sometimes girls who are taller, stronger, and more athletic than you get chosen because their “potential is higher.”

So what are you supposed to do when your dreams are slipping away from you right in front of your eyes? When that top 10 school doesn’t give you the time of day, or worse, tells you you’re just not good enough. When the only colleges that are vying for your attention, giving you offers, and the one you end up committing to are below what you think you’re capable of. Well, one thing you can do is:

Put your head down, keep that chip on your shoulder, grind, and shine.

  • Keeping your head down is remaining laser focused and not being distracted by what you think you might deserve. It’s easy to get caught up in your own hype and feel like the world owes you something, but the truth is, it doesn’t.
  • Keeping the chip on your shoulder is the fire that keeps you going. It’s the voice in your head that says, “Watch me prove you wrong.” It’s the hunger to get where you’re going even if that means you’re the only one who believes you can get there.
  • Grinding is not to be confused with running yourself into the ground. It’s finding your weaknesses, honing your craft, and not stopping until the job is done. The funny thing is, the job is never done, hence the grind.
  • Shining is when all your preparation comes through. It’s letting your performance speak for itself. Maybe it’s playing the school that rejected you later in your career or maybe it’s getting called up from a junior college to play at the division 1 level. This is the figurative middle finger moment and man does it feel good.

Something happens as you go through this process. You start to realize the thing that is fueling you becomes less about the people who told you couldn’t and more about how much you prove to yourself over and over again that you can. You slowly learn how to filter what noise is important and what’s not. You find people who you can aspire to be like and you chase that as if your life depends on it. You find your own voice and soon that’s the only voice that matters because you are the only one who knows what you are truly capable of.

You might not end up where you had originally planned. This can be a good thing or a bad thing. That’s up to you.